@WilliamAder: Some lady on The Price is Right just won a brand new 2016 Epi-Pen.
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@LeBearGirdle: *texting with girls* Her: I <3 you Me:[throws phone in disgust but picks it up and texts back angrily] you're less than 3
@StarWarsProblms: Emperor: How are my elite troops doing on Endor? Vader: They were all viciously murdered by teddy bears. Emperor: That sounds plausible.
@LackOfShame: I've never been as disappointed as my dog just was when she realized the food I dropped was a carrot.
@Nikkeya08: Sorry my diet made me slap the oreo out of your toddler's hand and scream "NOT TODAY SATAN!"