@crunchenhancer: Some people age like wine, others age like milk.
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@Lexi__Alexandra: My doctor said i shouldn't just binge drink all weekend. I tried taking his advice but can't drink a bottle of Jack Daniels every day.
@SteveSuckington: If you tell me I can only have sex with your sister over your dead body, your funeral is going to be awkward for some of your family.
@juliussharpe: I'd be less scared of trying to take a gun from a mugger than I am of taking an iPad from my kid.