@SergioValenCo: Some people follow their dreams, I follow lunatics on the internet.
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@OutOfLeftField_: Friend: Did you know that a butterfly only lives for 2 days? Me: I think that's a myth. Friend: No it's definitely a butterfly.
@ShoutingGoddess: You hurt the feelings of a person who was once the crush of a person who was once a friend of mine so you're a BAD person. ~ internet logic
@WoodyLuvsCoffee: *Goes to zoo to see the world's oldest tortoise. Guide: He's over 200 years old. How cool is that? *Tortoise says something racist.