@OctopusCaveman: Some people have this weird super power where they smell like their shampoo for hours after showering.
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@DamienFahey: I'll complain about the government invading my privacy after I tell you where I am on Facebook and posting what I'm eating on Instagram.
@Home_Halfway: I love this time of year, where my massive spider webs and the dead guy in my living room are "Halloween decorations" again.
@TheBoydP: The hardest part of being a dog is not understanding why squirrels don’t want to play with you.
@dshack8: Bummed cuz parents wont send their kids to my resort that teaches how to pay attention. I thought "Concentration Camp" would be a gold mine.