@PieChord: Some people won't try bacon for religious reasons. I won't try religion for bacon reasons.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Smooheed: *walks into room to find toddler stuck upside down yelling for help* "Hold it right there baby, Mommy's just taking a quick picture"
@TheTweetOfGod: All human beings are threads interwoven in the great tapestry of life, except for that one guy at your office. What the hell is his problem?
@Jill_Doe_: There are few problems in life that can't be sorted by slowing down, taking a deep breath, and THEN drawing winged eyeliner on a raccoon.
@TheCatWhisprer: Sometimes a man has needs that can't be fulfilled in the home. [goes to animal shelter and pets all the cats]