@TheTalkingPipe: Some people wouldn't understand irony if it beat them over the head with a helmet.
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@crushingbort: Home Alone (1990, Comedy) Two burglars attempt to murder an abandoned 8-year-old child
@OtherDanOBrien: *reads an article on a subject I know* This is bullshit *reads an article on a subject I don't know* If it's published it must be accurate
@dshack8: 3. The number of times you can flip a grilled cheese sandwich before you notice that you have the pan on the wrong burner...cuz of Twitter.