@BuckyIsotope: Nude Descending a Staircase is both my favorite work of art and the most common entry on my criminal records.

@Tinkerbell_: There's no such thing as coincidence? I'm confused. If there is no such thing why did they name it? Coincidence? I think not Xx

@buhsbaby_baby: [before sex] Just so you know.. I can only be on top cause' I'm not gonna take my backpack off

@Teowulf: When people post sad things on Facebook I just want to hug them and whisper softly in their ears, "no one cares."

@KalvinMacleod: [murders Aquaman with some super absorbent paper towels]