@kwirkyKerri: Somebody parked in my spot and now I'm in the market for a rocket launcher.
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@primawesome: Every time I have a salad for lunch my stomach feels the same way a dog does when someone fake throws a tennis ball.
@SteveKoehler22: Snapchat is going public in March with a $30 billion IPO. Investors only hope the value of stock shares holds up longer than its snaps.
@KeetPotato: if you walk up to a british policeman and play the benny hill music he legally has to chase you until you turn it off
@The_JRM: I sometimes lie awake and wonder how much useful information I've left out of my brain to make room for these Hanson songs.