@codyspencer0: Somebody said "hey wanna eat this apple" and I said "no thanks I ate a PC for lunch"
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@TheDailySchmuck: I'm black. I should be able to stick my finger in milk and make it chocolate milk. But evolution is bogus.
@dshack8: Cliff diving? No thanks. I get all of my near death thrills by rolling my eyes when my wife asks me to move my feet while she vacuums.
@AmishPornStar1: I don't know why I always end up behind the old lady who is trying to do a reverse mortgage on her home at the ATM.