@ramenfuneral: somebody sell me a flock of sheep so i can give them cool superhero names like bahman, the green lambtern and wonder woolman
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@Brianhopecomedy: My son is explaining why my daughter is crying but I'm not buying it as I don't think she can even say, "Please kick me in the face".
@shkeeber: My job blocked the Favstar website and I'm not sure if I should quit or take hostages. Haha! Jk. I'm totally taking hostages.
@ColoradoUgly: I decided to tell the kids that Santa is made up but nighttime home invasions are very very real.