@Tmoney68: If really good-looking people are "eye candy" I guess that puts me somewhere around the "eye broccoli" category.

@patnspankme: There's no I in team but there is an I in marriage. There's also ME, AA and RAGE.

@Twisted_Mettle: RUN FOREST!!! RUN!!! But the trees just stood there. Frozen with fear. In the end, the flames consumed them all.

@mickeza1: You have 90,000 followers, follow 92,000, and all you tweet are @s thanking people for following back. Are you raising an army for Mordor?

@filthyson: How to make-out - 1. Hold her close 2. Kiss passionately 3. Don't mention the budget deficit or your father