@spekulation: Someone asked who sang Johnny B Goode, and I said Marty McFly because I'm not an idiot and I know how time travel works.
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@JimGaffigan: When are they going to drug test the audience of "The Price Is Right."? No one should be that happy.
@gwatts77: If women would start naming their periods like hurricanes it would be alot easier for us men to remember which argument you are referring to
@oothikicha: Guy: you've been a bad girl. Girl: yes baby, punish me. Guy: OK. *burns all her shoes*.
@ArfMeasures: FRIEND: Remember, women love confidence ME: Ok [Later] DATE: So *smiles* am I gonna have a good time tonight? ME *confidently* nope