@FuckabillyRex: Someone just knocked on the door of my apartment and I yelled, "There's no one here," so I think I handled that very well.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Jacksawyerr: If I got kidnapped I'd continuously sing Pitbull songs until they kill me, I'd die but at least they'd suffer too.
@TheWadest: Me: *unfreezes cro-magnon woman I uncover on an arctic expedition* Cro-magnon woman: "I have a boyfriend."
@imdaintyaf: When you gaze into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you, wraps a towel around itself and screams oh wait that's my neighbor haha Hi Pam!