@Ristolable: Someone just posted an article on Facebook and said "file this under sad." WAS I SUPPOSED TO BE FILING EVERYTHING
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@murrman5: [rose from the movie titanic a couple years later sitting on crowded bus] excuse me, can you slide over so I ca- "NO, there's no room"
@_chasing_amy: 9 just scolded me at the grocery for buying wine. I told him it was ok, I was 21 to which he loudly responded, Nooo, you're 38. Thanks son.
@EndhooS: [Don't let hot barrista know I'm a goose] "Can I get you a coffee?" Just a honk chonklate for me "A what?" CHOCOLATE, a hot chocolate plz.