@mauleePillar: Someone just sat across from me at a table at Starbucks. They got too close to my food so I bit them.
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@AndyAsAdjective: It's that wonderful time of year again when the spiderwebs I've been too lazy to clean become functional decorations.
@MelKassel: ME: do dogs think we have three mouths because we pick stuff up with our hands? VET: where exactly is your dog ME: he's uh coming later