@Sarcasmo718: Someone needs to tell drug sniffing dogs about the whole "man's best friend" thing.
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@daemonic3: [bank] Robber: EVERYONE GET DOWN! Me: [crying] my wife left & my kids think I'm a joke Robber: No I mean- Robber2: Wait! Let him finish
@mostunladylike: Yog see woman Yog ask woman out Yog go on date Yog fall in love Yog act like an idiot Yog get dumped Yoghurt.
@I_am_Lukem: I don't understand why people get excited about carbon dating. But then perhaps I just haven't met the right pencil.