@funnyordie: Someone should probably go check on Steve.
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@GrantTanaka: [writes THIS IS A ROBBERY on a deposit slip, slides it to teller] [teller writes something, slides it back] NO THIS IS A DEPOSIT SLIP
@Jenny4ashley: I haven't been around a baby in so long I can't even remember how to put their leash on.
@daemonic3: [grocery store] Ok, milk... Check! Eggs... Check! Tomatoes... Check! "Sir, can you wait for the total and just write one check please?"
@thatUPSdude: I'm not saying I'm bilingual but Brad Pitt is hot. In other news, I might not know what bilingual means.