@Thing_Finder: Someone stole my identity. And then sent it back with $100 and a note that said "So sorry man. Hope things work out."
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@drubicabra: Just witnessed a white girl take a selfie with her coffee in Starbucks. I always heard the legends but never thought I'd see it in the wild.
@lovejulieacafe: *Speed Dating* Him: Do you have any hobbies? Me: *tying my hair in a big knot under my chin so I look like I have a beard* "TAAA-DAAA!"
@AndyAsAdjective: an alarm clock that repeatedly & loudly makes the sound of a windshield wiper going across a windshield that is not completely wet
@Kimgee8: Apparently "naked" is not the answer when someone mad at you asked, how do you sleep at night?