@WilliamAder: Someone tweeted today that they were "29-ish" and I didn't know you could "ish" 15 years.
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@ch000ch: ME [8:49PM]: on my way, taking a crab GF [8:50PM]: u mean a cab ME [8:52PM]: not exactly. be there in several days
@schmittsteve: - Dracula darling, you have something stuck in your teeth. - Vhere, here? - No... - Here? - No, just go look in- - GO LOOK IN WHAT, SARAH?
@007Pepe_Rex: A guy gets hit on the head by a falling soda can. But he's allright. Guess he was lucky *puts on sunglasses* It was a soft drink #FFFC
@UnderTheJewFro: I was starving earlier so I opened up a beanbag chair. There were no beans, only styrofoam. Im furious, Im hungry and I have nowhere to sit.