@duplicitron: Sometimes a family is walking towards you taking up the entire sidewalk and you have no choice but to just become part of that family.
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@bobbiejo448: I love how all the characters in kids shows are always SO thrilled while at work. Like Bob never gets pissed over a missing screwdriver.
@UNTRESOR: If you cut off a mommy blogger's head she can continue mommy blogging for up to three full minutes.
@markleggett: I often think "Why would anyone live in Gotham? It's a shithole!", but then you choose to live in the shithole that is [YOUR CITY NAME].
@Cheeseboy22: The same people that made fun of me for my calculator watch in high school are now wearing Apple watches.