@SortaBad: Sometimes at the airport I'll ask a stranger if they have an iphone charger and if they do I take mine out and say "nice, me too"
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@Vodkantots: As a Jew, I refuse to enter any steam room or sauna until I've seen other people come out.
@DaveAmiott: Author: So, I've got this children's book. It's about a hungry caterpillar. Agent: Pass Author: A VERY hungry caterpillar. Agent: Go on...
@murrman5: "do you know the best way to get rid of a wasp nest?" no, try using your phone [throws phone and hits wasp nest] *running* I meant google it