@karlainvt: Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver...
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@Fred_Delicious: Age 8 - "I can achieve anything" 18 - "should I buy a lobster farm?" 28 - "if you are watching this then I have been killed by lobsters"
@Dutch_50: Survey: Are you a Democrat or a Republican? Me: Labels are for soup cans Survey: Can you tell us which way you're leaning? Me: Clam chowder
@SteveMartinToGo: Whenever I hear someone died of natural causes, I think, "Wait a minute. I have that."
@Reverend_Scott: [class trip] I'm farmer Joe, this is my farm DO U HAVE COWS? Yes, it's a dairy farm DO U HAVE WHALES? Kid, why wouldn't we have whales?