@sammyrhodes: Sometimes I feel like Valentine's Day was invented by a guy who had way too many chocolate covered strawberries.
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@DepecheALAmode: I want to get married just so I can throw my wedding ring in anger. I bet it's a lot cooler than aggressively untying a friendship bracelet.
@WilliamAder: I'm forbidding the twelve people who regularly star my tweets to ever fly in an airplane together.
@XplodingUnicorn: I love strapping my kids into their car seats. It’s the closest I can legally come to putting them in straitjackets.