@Avepates: Sometimes I like to hysterically tell mall security that my infant son has gone missing just so I can show people baby pictures of myself.
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@AntozWolf: "You the bomb" "No you the bomb"....- A compliment in America.An argument in the Middle East.
@HelloJessicaFox: I'm going to visit a dairy farm and pet all the cheeses and see if they'll eat out of my hand.
@unravelingfire: Him: [running out of burning house carrying two house plants and three Led Zeppelin CDs] I DIDN'T KNOW WHICH PLANTS YOU WANTED
@torrami: When hubs is sleeping I put my Care Bear blanket on him and take the most adorable blackmail photos ever.