@peteholmes: Sometimes I like to pretend an ! is just a ? squeezing through a tight space.
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@man_in_radiator: I hate it when people try to use big words when they clearly don't know their meaning. It makes them sound so gelatinous and isosceles.
@soccerskiingmom: If any Americans still feel like emigrating to Canada, can you please bring up some Thanksgiving leftovers?
@StellaRtwot: I think I'll test to see if my husband is checking my browser history by searching "How to tell if your baby is black in the womb."
@Amburglar_: My sister borrowed my favorite shirt without asking again, so I changed her Facebook profile picture to a positive Clearblue pregnancy test.