@mattwhitlockPM: Sometimes I spend whole meetings wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.
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@truegritrumble: NORTH CAROLINA:We believe in family values. ME:Like Disney movies? NC:Exactly. ME:Like Mulan, where a cross dresser saves China? NC:...
@thwphipps: the word 'freelancer' originally came from medieval knights who would kill evildoers for the king and THEN NOT GET PAID FOR EIGHT MONTHS
@caseytduncan: I hate when friends send me home with leftovers in plastic containers. "Here, you throw this food away and then clean the containers."
@Kyle_Lippert: If you feed your kitten Muscle Milk it will become a tiger in as little as 90 days or you get your money back.