@Carbosly: Sometimes I wish I was an octopus so I could hit 8 colleagues at once.
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@DanMentos: [showing my 4yo a Slinky] me: look, it’s walking down the stairs kid: what else can it do me: literally nothing
@SamuelHLowe: - What do you do to relax? - I enjoy people watching. - The most relaxing thing for me is singing in the shower. - I know.
@panmidwest: THERAPIST: what's wrong? WIFE: he speaks in typos ME: EVERYTHING IS JUST FIND BRENDA! THERAPIST: ok maybe we should take 5 ME: food idea