@ComedicBust: Sometimes I'll casually say "what else do you want?" on the phone, so the pizza guy thinks I'm ordering for more than just me.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@eskimo_tekillya: I recently bought a corset to spice up my sex life. Once I've learned how to breathe in the damn thing I'll tell you how it worked out.
@JanineEB4: My biggest regret to date is probably never telling Kary C, Kerri B, Cari R and Kerry L from 4th grade that their names were spelled wrong..
@nPhelendriqal: Anytime I see a tweet in a different language, I read it as "Oo ee Oo ah ah, ting tang walla walla bing bang."
@LackOfShame: I've never been as disappointed as my dog just was when she realized the food I dropped was a carrot.