@abhorrent_wife: Sometimes I'll show my husband the chewed up food in my mouth just so he's reminded of the delicacy and beauty of the flower he chose.
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@dshack8: "I really have no idea how to pronounce my name but I won't admit it." Guys named Geoff.
@BangMyBongo: Mary on Facebook says this generation is way to reliant on technology... She then sent me 7 Candy Crush invites
@robfee: House Hunters: We need plenty of space for entertaining, 62 bedrooms, a fully staffed Cheesecake Factory & a heliport. Our budget is $287.