@MouthyMess: Sometimes I'll start talking to someone on the train, then go "Oh, this is where I get off" then close my eyes & stick my hand in my pants.
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@sensitivetim: 2 friends and I once pulled the 3 kids in a trenchcoat trick & killed a man got tried as an adult but when they hung mike, paul & I fell out
@hiitsmolly: "I could probz bench press, like, five of you"-me talking to a cool squirrel I just met
@NYC_Blonde: Are babies like tamagotchis? Like, will my friend take care of it if I forget it at her house?