@Stellacopter: Sometimes it's fun to walk out of the ladies room licking your fingers.
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@Brampersandon_: How did the date go? -Not good. Aww what went wrong? -*thinks back to accidentally popping a zit into her soup* She just wasn't my type.
@VaguelyFunnyDan: Had no idea why my salad was $175, 'til the waiter explained that they only use Beets by Dre.