@StellaRtwot: Sometimes the last thing people hear before they're murdered is the sound of their pen that they won't stop clicking.
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@ThaJawn: (prostate exam) Dr: WOW! I've never seen this before Me: OMG! WHAT *loud click Me: DID YOU JUST TAKE A SELFIE Dr:.. And send Me: WTF?
@NikiWithIssues: I really miss Jake. And Clyde. And Marissa. Gina too. I should stop naming my cupcakes right before I eat them. :(
@ThaJawn: Werewolf's wife: IDGAF! It's a full moon tonight and I will not have you shedding all over! Outside, now!