@Cherry_Row: Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see.
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@Dirty_Naomi: After mating, a female Praying Mantis kills & eat's the male. Guess she knows it's easier to claim life insurance rather than child support.
@YUCKYBOT: Can you guys give me the names of some famous athletes and prisoners? I'm making a pros and cons list.
@SatansTongue: *wife opens present* "You got me the action figure you wanted?" Ugh if you don't appreciate it then give me it *takes gift and runs to room*
@XplodingUnicorn: Door-to-door Christian guy: Have you heard the greatest story ever told? Me: Definitely. I love Star Wars.