@fuzzlime: sometimes when I finish eating a bag of microwave popcorn I try to eat a couple unpopped kernels just to convince myself it's really over
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@KenJennings: I've been at this elementary school talent show for half an hour and I've already heard "Shake It Off" 137 times.
@withanewname: [my first day as a financial investor] "I'm going all in on this Acme Corporation. Anybody want a piece?"