@FudgeRobot: Sometimes when I'm about to sneeze, I snort some glitter. Then when I finally sneeze, glitter fills the air and people think I'm a wizard.
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@murrman5: "so, have you ever done a job interview over the phone before?" [over vigorous peeing] no, this will be a first
@TheRolo: Juliet: you know it's true love, when you finish each other's- Romeo: LIFE Juliet: [sighs all annoyed] like why do you say shit like that?