@LambyMcSheeps: Sometimes you need a little distance to see things clearly, but other times it is obviously a bear and you should probably just run
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@mompsychologist: Husband: So we've basically given up. Me: On what? H: *gestures to 4yo carefully piling spaghetti on his head*: Parenting.
@WoodyLuvsCoffee: DOCTOR: You need to excercise portion control. ME: Thank God. For a second I thought you said I needed to exercise.
@stargazer15_: I'm the kind of girl that will suck helium from a balloon and talk dirty to you in a Minnie Mouse voice. Really dirty.
@WheelTod: Do you realize that if real women had the same proportions as Barbie they'd be only 11.5 inches tall?