@realHamOnWry: Sometimes you'll hate a person when you first meet because it saves time.
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@TheQuietPsycho: Meanwhile, in a parallel world...a banana slowly and seductively peels and eats a human, while locking eyes with another banana...
@AndyAsAdjective: Did you dream of me, baby? -Are you a swimming pool full of Lucky Charms & milk? No, silly. -Then no.
@courtneyno: The light above my desk is going out. I feel like I've been at a really boring rave for the last 7 hours.
@dave_cactus: ME: Well, time to make like a tree, and leaf. HER: *giggling* So, my place or... ME: *starts sprouting leaves from my fingers* HER: WHAT THE