@runawaycupcake: Son: Can you teach me about fractions? Me: Sure. I love 2/3 of my children.
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@BillMc7: listen, officer - t h e o r e t i c a l l y - would I still get a carpool lane ticket if I have a body in the trunk
@rickolantern: Text is the perfect way of saying I have some information I need to give you but I in no way shape or form want to hear your voice
@pattymo: "And the guy's name was Anthony WEINER? Come on" - high school AP U.S. history student, 2046