@_troyjohnson: Son, my best advice is to find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and marry her. She knows how to make bad decisions and stick with them.
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@Book_Krazy: * Kindergarten* Hi kids! I'm the homeroom mom for your class. [writes name on chalkboard] [Boy Raises hand] We can't read. No one can read
@doublewenis: My wife used to get so fat that she had to go to the hospital; then a person would fall out of her. That doesn't sound normal.
@Cheeseboy22: I just googled "Is there really cowbell in the actual song Don't Fear the Reaper?" and my first response was, "Go outside and do something."