@iwearaonesie: son: Where’s mom? I need her to sign my permission slip
me: I can do it
son: My teacher said it has to be an adult
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@pleatedjeans: Forget a beach bod I want a bat's bod give me giant fangs and the long, leathery wings I need to rule the night
@man_spach: *tries several times to connect to the internet using a dial-up modem* *reaches #1 on the dubstep charts*
@fro_vo: [Jack Ryan] CIA BOSS: who are you JACK: (trying to be cool) ryan. jack ryan BOSS: nice to meet you ryan JACK: no it's BOSS: everyone this is ryan EVERYONE: hi ryan RYAN: hi
@IGotsSmarts: Batman Begins Crossdressing #AddAWordRuinAMovie
@GoldenSpirals: Hippocrates did very well for himself, considering he was named after cages for a large mammal.
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