@OBiiieeee: Son, your mom and I have been fighting a lot lately and we have decided that *dad piledrives mom into the coffee table* we're gonna go pro.
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@ItsAndyRyan: HOT SINGLES IN YOUR AREA VALUE YOUR FRIENDSHIP TOO MUCH TO RUIN IT WITH SEX. SURE, YOU'RE ATTRACTIVE, THEY JUST DON'T SEE YOU IN THAT WAY
@TheSharona06: When taking your dog to the vet it's very important to remember to put your dog in the car.
@ieatanddrink: Think I nailed my job interview today because I wore a graduation cap to make it look like I graduated high school
@squirrel74wkgn: Don't worry guys, my wife just turned the car radio down so we shouldn't be lost much longer.