@NintenDom: Sorry about all the Mario references. I didn't mean to one-up you. I'll pipe down.
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@KalvinMacleod: WIFE: *spells out words so the kids won’t know what she is saying* ME: [to the kids] I don’t know either.
@jackiembouvier: Well, Jesus, now all Samsung's competitors have to say is "we won't blow up in your pocket and set you ablaze!"
@HeyZeus666: I’d never snoop through my girlfriend’s phone out of love, a deep respect and the inability to crack her password.