@briangaar: Sorry babe, you knew you were dating a bad boy [shuffles Pokemon cards without the plastic covers]
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@Ristolable: He died doing what he loved: typing his symptoms into WebMD instead of going to the doctor
@click4amanda: Why do they write PIZZA all over the box???? what else could possibly be in there???
@Mr_Kapowski: Me: Hurry up kid. We're gonna be late for school 6 y/o daughter: *begins eating each Lucky Charms marshmallow individually*
@TheBoydP: Not to brag but I'm never late for work without a good reason. For example this week my boss is on vacation...