@DickScurvy: Sorry for releasing thousands of shrieking bats at your wedding. Sometimes I don't know what to do with my hands.
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@ofcourseyoudid: Bird of peace? The dove Bird of war? The hawk Bird of true love? ..wait for it... .... The swallow *walks offstage
@sirmunchie: My GF arrives in town next week. I'm so excited! I just hope that all the tension w/ Russia doesn't make U.S. immigration hold up the mail.
@causticbob: It's my mate's birthday today. He doesn't drink, smoke, gamble or cheat on his missus. We've got no idea how to celebrate it.