@runolgarun: "Sorry, I fail to see how I 'misled' you when my profile CLEARLY says I'm 'a total cat person'?" - half-cat/half-person being after bad date
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@curlycomedy: I like when players of opposite teams hug after the game as if to say, "We're all so very, very rich."
@jonnysun: DATE: dessert? MY BRAIN: im full MY STOMACH: i want food DATE: one piece of chocolate wont hurt MY DOG: THAT MAN IS TRYIMG TO KILL MY OWNER
@PJTLynch: Wife: Wow, I'm tired Me: Go relax, give me the recipe and I'll make dinner [Five minutes later] Me: Honey, I think we're out of..."oven"?