@DaddyJew: Sorry I ruined your surprise party by telling everyone it was an intervention
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@Sarcasticsapien: [walks up to coworker's desk] I know I don't say this often enough, but thank you for not showing me pictures of your kids.
@HenpeckedHal: son: and this one? me: also carrots son: I don't like carrots me: I know [how I've kept my 2 year old from opening the family gifts under the tree]
@madcaplaughs30: I bet when the toaster came out everyone was happy they didn't have to throw their bread at lightning anymore.