@Eightinchgoat: Sorry I tried to strengthen my immune system by asking your wife to breast feed me.
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@LizHackett: I feel like I'm not getting the full experience of a gas station bathroom if I don't cut and dye my hair and change my identity.
@briangaar: "Sir, I need you to explain your resume." Well, my pet tiger & I were beloved cartoon characters "Current job?" I pee on things I don't like
@Scott_A_Gilmore: Oh look! A guy with "Stand-Up Comic" in his bio unfollowed me two seconds after I followed back. That's never happened before.