@Eightinchgoat: Sorry I tried to strengthen my immune system by asking your wife to breast feed me.
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@ceejoyner: When clowns first attacked these shores nobody took it seriously. It's just one boat, how many could there be, they said.
@oothikicha: The keys Home-Insert-End-Delete are together on the keyboard. Whoever created the keyboard was a big fan of one night stands.
@greg_vee: If by self-help you mean helping myself to all the liquor in your cabinet... Then yeah... I'm about as self-helpful as they come.
@hellohappy_time: 3rd base is actually watching a horror movie then looking up theories about the ending on message boards together