@Sassafrantz: Sorry I unfriended you after seeing your Facebook "Year In Review" but it was bad enough the first time.
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@TheTweetOfGod: When people say "To be honest...", it means that up to that point they've been lying.
@TheBeerGuy73: [Voice from police helicopter] PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR! *raises hands* *takes flattering selfie in helicopter spotlight* *uploads new avi*
@hazelmotes1: Son, I grew up in a golden age when the bookstore didn't have an entire section labeled "Teen Paranormal Romance."