@Swishergirl24: Sorry I was cleaning my phone screen and accidentally took 37 selfies.
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@mean_spice: Teacher: welcome to health class Me: my friend said you can get a girl pregnant by kissing her? Teacher: sir please just mop the floor
@TheToddWilliams: [office party, 1842] Ralph Waldo Emerson: The only gift is a portion of thyself Me: Look Ralph, the rules to Secret Santa were very clear
@mrsjohngoodman: One time my teacher was telling a story about war and the girl in front of me slowly opened her laptop and liked Downy on Facebook.
@UnFitz: It's called "personal grooming" as though we might get confused and groom a total stranger.