@bossy_bootz: Sorry I was staring at your nachos while you were talking about your painful divorce
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@Spaziotwat: My wife is terrified of thunderstorms. The banging outside the window is horrendous, but if we let her in she'll just get the dog all wet.
@ibid78: [A-ha rehearsal] "Here's the lyric: Take On Me." "What about Take Me On?" [4 hrs of arguing later] "Ok we'll say both. Now let's get perms."
@phalguy: I wrote a book titled: How Dragons Are Greater Than Unicorns Daenerys Targaryen wrote the foreword. All she wrote was: No shit Sherlock!
@Jake_Vig: THEM: What's it called when you think about them all the time? ME: Love. T: What if it's about murdering them all the time? M: Also love.